


Your Life Is Not A Countdown

by infiniteworld8



Category: Animorphs (TV), Animorphs - Katherine A. Applegate
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Cuddling & Snuggling, Developing Relationship, Dry Humping, F/M, Fast Food, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Light Smut, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Kissing, No Sex, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-29
Packaged: 2019-02-23 12:57:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13190559
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/infiniteworld8/pseuds/infiniteworld8
Summary: After a mission goes awry all the animorphs are taking it hard. But Rachel in particular is struggling to hold things together. Tobias does his best to cheer her up.





	Your Life Is Not A Countdown

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bookworm83197](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookworm83197/gifts).



> Title Taken from this quote.
> 
> “Your life is not a countdown to your death, but a stepping stone for the lives that will live after you. Squander today, and you will find yourself useless tomorrow.”   
> ― A.J. Darkholme, Rise of the Morningstar
> 
> I haven't read the book, but the quote fits.
> 
> This book is written for Bookworm83197. Who is amazing, adorable, so sweet and kind, a great friend, BAMF and forever in my mind has a sword strapped to their back and a cloak, and the most bad ass knee high boots known to humanity (Yes, you are a little like Ruby from RWBY). Enjoy.

My name is Tobias. I would tell you my last name, you can’t find me based on that. I don’t have an address, a library card, any of the small things that mark a human. I can’t tell you though because then you’d find my friends. 

And I’d do anything to protect them. 

My life is over, at least my life as a human. Aliens came to earth as slimy slugs. They want to take over Earth and humanity, other aliens came, they look kinda like mouthless centaurs but more regal, anyway they came to help us fight. And in the process me and four other kids got morphing powers and sucked into the battle for basically the whole world.

It’s pretty crazy when you think about it. Not as crazy as what I’m about to tell you next.

We can turn into animals. But only for a two hours. Then you're stuck. That's what happened to me. I got stuck as a hawk unable to morph back to human, I almost went crazy before I finally got my morphing ability back. Now I can morph back to human but only for two hours otherwise I'm stuck.

It sucks, but that's the only option I have. Be a hawk or be out the fight. The last one’s not really an option. As I said before I'd do anything for my friends. What I probably didn't say is that they're all I have. Nobody is looking for me. I disappeared and nobody gives a damn I'm gone. Except maybe my aunt and uncle a little because they don't get a check for me anymore.

Sad thing is, I'm happier as a hawk. I miss seeing human things but I don't miss the bruises or cigarette burns or yelling or other stuff.

Anyway things are  _ better _ now. 

I remind myself everyday how much better things are.

It was a beautiful day, and I was engaged in one of my favorite pastimes. Watching Rachel. 

OK, that sounded totally creepy. I'm not stalking her. 

I'm a good a hundred feet above her if not more, riding the thermals circling waiting for her to leave school.

She's been in there an hour and fifty minutes. Detention.

Rachel never gets detention. But today she did. I heard the story from a group of kids walking out. They didn’t notice the hawk perched in the tree but I was close enough to hear them gossiping about how Rachel had pushed Melissa Waverly against a locker and then begun pounding her face in. Melissa Waverly was a bully and Rachel definitely didn’t tolerate bullies but the Rachel tended to incapacitate and not destroy. At least as far as humans were concerned.

She was on edge, we all were on edge. It had been a bad week. Yeerks had taken over a summer camp in the mountains, it was for semi rich kids of influential parents. The plan was to infest the kids and from there the parents. We had tried to take down the camp and rescue the kids, the Yeerks somehow knew. In our attempt to rescue the kids we had only made things worse. Three members of the Yeerk Peace Movement had been at the camp, attempting to help the rescue. Rather than be possibly interrogated and reveal what they had known, they had killed themselves. The other guys were close enough that they had been close to see as one woman had pulled an explosive from her pocket and detonated it. Several hostile Yeerks were killed in the blast as well as her and the distraction had been enough for my friends to get away.

Rachel blamed herself for that, we all did. There wasn’t much we could have done. But still it was hard. Cassie was coping by spending extra time with her animals. Marco was eating junk food and playing a crap ton of video games. Jake was exercising and reviewing the mission, “AKA running five miles a day, while berating himself about something he had no control over”. Ax and I were similarly upset, but Rachel had seemed fine.

Sure, she was upset at first but she had seemed to shake it off. I was waiting for the fallout. Rachel played hard, worked hard and felt hard. Everything was intense. 

Today she raced down the steps of the school and jumped on her bike. Her backpack was slung over one shoulder, her hair was a little wild. And her mouth was set in a hard angry line.

I flew behind her, sensing she didn’t want to talk. Surprisingly, and a little worryingly she didn’t turn towards the route that would take her home, nor towards any of the other guy's houses. Instead she started in a a new direction. Warily I followed her to her destination. It was an out of the way fast food joint about ten minutes from school. The sign outside said “Greasy Sal’s Diner.” A smaller sign below added “If It’s Food We Fry It.”

My eyebrows would have raised into my hair if I had hair or eyebrows. I watched as Rachel walked in. Rachel tended to eat pretty healthy, and while she wasn’t above fast food, this place was definitely not within her purview.

I settled down in a tree to wait. I didn’t wait long, five minutes later Rachel stormed out, slamming the door behind her. She was obviously pissed as she yanked her bike upright, swung a leg around and grasped her handlebars. But that was all, she remained frozen for a few seconds, then abruptly sobbed. Tears were streaming down her face and her voice hitched. 

I felt wrong for watching her, and helpless to actually do anything. This was Rachel, who was probably the strongest of us all. What did I have to say as the one who had once tried to kill himself by flying into a glass window...and that was the time the guys knew about. 

Still…<Rachel.>

Rachel gave the slightest jerk of her head, before quickly scrubbing her hand across her face. She looked around, spotting me circling in the sky but didn’t say anything. Absently she waved a hand in the air, it would have looked like she was brushing a bug away. But instead she was indicating for me to leave her alone. 

I didn’t thought speak again, until she was in her backyard. Wordlessly, I settled on a bush. The fence was high enough, no one would see us talking and wonder why a bird and a girl appeared to be having a conversation. 

<Rachel?> I tried again and this time was rewarded by Rachel turning towards me. Her face was streaked with dried tears. 

“What Tobias?” 

<You’re crying.> I felt dumb knowing I had pointed out the obvious.

“My eyes were watering.” Rachel started towards her house stairs then abruptly dropped down so she was sitting in the grass and her knees were tucked against her chest.

<You were crying.> I flapped down to settle on her shoulder, being as gentle as I could so my talons didn’t cut her. 

“Don’t you have better stuff to do than follow me around like a stalker?” Rachel’s words were vicious, and than almost immediately she was apologizing. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that…” 

Rachel usually was somewhat snippy, but typically it was friendly banter, half annoyed banter with Marco or a sarcastic jab at her cousin Jake. Usually, it wasn’t directed towards me. 

“It’s just everything today.” She sniffled again, wiping a hand across her face. I longed to demorph and comfort her but we were in the middle of her backyard and the risk of someone seeing me was to great.

Instead I shifted my wings and waited in silence for her to continue. Sure enough seconds later, Rachel muttered. “First that camp, and then Melissa at school and then the one… This is really stupid, forget I said anything.”

<It’s not stupid.>

She brushed some imaginary dirt of the knees of her jeans but didn’t speak again. So I added. <What happened after school?>”

“It’s really dumb, like really, really dumb.”

<It’s not dumb if it upset you.>

“It’s dumb if people died, and everything is messed up and I’m crying because I can’t get Loaded Fries with Meatballs at a fast food place.” She started to stand up abruptly causing me to quickly shift so I wasn’t thrown to the ground. “I’m okay, it’s all okay.”

I didn’t know what to say to that. I knew Rachel wasn’t just crying about food, and the very fact that she had just admitted to crying was an even bigger sign that things were  _ not _ okay.

<Rachel, it’s--> I broke off, not sure what I wanted to say. Rachel was roughly wiping a hand across her face again. Fruitlessly trying to pretend she wasn’t crying still. I finally found what I wanted to say. <You don’t always have to be the strong one.>

Wrong thing.

Rachel turned to me. Her eyes fierce. “This is war. We lose people. We have to make hard decisions. We don’t get to be weak. So yes, I have to be strong Tobias.” She was staring at me unblinkingly and I held her gaze, worried about what I could see in her expression.

We might win the war against the yeerks. We might lose. But either way I worried about Rachel. Either way I worried we would lose her. She was burning out like a candle, more so than any of us and I didn’t know how to get her to stop. She turned her head away from me and started moving. I flapped away, landing on a bush near her door. She didn’t look at me as she shouldered her backpack and set off across her yard. Her voice was taut and brittle, “I have a history paper due tomorrow and a Trig exam, Mom and my sisters are gone for the night, so I’ll finally have some peace and quiet to study.” The message was clear.

Go away Tobias.

She opened the door and walked in, I didn’t see her face again, but I was sure I didn’t imagine the sob as the latch closed.

There wasn’t much I could do for Rachel, I flapped my wings rising into the sky. I couldn’t bring back the YPM members, or save the kids that had been infested only a day ago. I was flying but I altered my course as I realised there was one thing I could do.

XXXX XXXX

Marco was eating a bag of chips while playing some racing game and snacking on cold pizza. <Marco!> I mentally rolled my eyes when that didn’t have any effect. Marco was one of the few people who could get so engrossed in something he didn’t notice someone speaking to him literally in his mind. <Marco!>

Marco finally looked over, spilling the coke he had been about to raise to his lips. He swore as the brown liquid soaked into his jeans and tossed his controller down before coming over to his window and unlatching it.

“What?” He scowled at me, obviously irritated at being disturbed. 

<Can I borrow some money from you?>

Marco looked at me raising an eyebrow and smirking. “They having a sale on field mice or something?” 

He chuckled at his own joke. Normally if one of the others were here they would have said something to Marco about being insensitive (especially Cassie).  I liked Marco’s attitude though, better to laugh and find all this funny than to treat me like I was some poor kid to be pitied continually.

<Very funny.> I ruffled my feathers and shuffled across his desk intentionally knocking one of his video-game disc to the floor. Marco knew what I had done and glared at me. I pretended not to notice. 

<So will you?>

“Why do you need money?”

<Will you lend it to me or not?>

“Depends on why you need it.”

I flapped over to Marco’s bed and started pecking at his pillow. Marco dived across just as I had ripped a hole in the cloth revealing a ten dollar bill. “Hey, you little bastard, how did you even know it was there.” He snatched the pillow up. 

I didn’t answer his question, but asked again. <Money?>

Marco sighed. “Why are you bothering me, go ask Jake or something.”

<Jake will ask me what I want it for.>

“And what do you want it for?”

<Something.>

Marco settled at his desk money forgotten and a calculating look on his face. “What exactly?”

<It’s private.>

Marco laughed, “Is it for a certain someone.”

I didn’t answer and instead glared at him. Marco was unperturbed. “Don’t try your hawk death stare, I’m right aren’t I?” Marco propped his feet up on his desk, enjoying himself. “Is it...Rachel?”

If a hawk could blush I would have, instead I awkwardly ruffled my feathers. 

Marco laughed again, I thought he was going to ask me more questions but instead he pulled out a twenty dollar bill and laid it on the desk. 

I grabbed the money in my beak and was going towards the window about to leave when something else clicked. There was no way I could go around town carrying money in my beak, as a hawk.

Sheepishly I asked <Can I uh...borrow some clothes?>

Marco, was finding this all to funny and I tried to not look at his smirk as he went to his closet and found me a pair of jeans and a T shirt.

I laid the money down on the bed, and landed on the floor, wordlessly I began to demorph. Within less than a minute I had gone from a hawk to a teenage boy. Marco yelped as he turned around, then quickly closed his eyes. “Dude, what are you? A barbarian? Don’t you morph clothes?”

<Clothes…> I tried to thought speak the word and realised a few seconds later, I had a mouth I could speak.

I didn’t bother to repeat what I had thought as I looked down and realised I was naked...I tried to remember the last time I had demorphed. I was pretty sure it had been during a mission. I had taken my morphing suit off, Jake had been bleeding badly and there was no time for him to remorph. My morphing suit had been a makeshift bandage and without the clothes I could morph slightly faster anyway.

“Clothes.” Marco tossed the Jeans and T-shirt towards me. They hit me in the chest and started to fall to the floor before I could  make my arms move to catch. 

“Th-thanks..Tha--thanks.” I rolled the word around my tongue, getting the feel for the words. I wasn’t aware how much I sounded like Ax until I noticed Marco watching me with a weird expression on his face. I didn’t want to hear what else he had to say.

Instead I grabbed the clothes and went into the bathroom adjoining his room. Marco was shorter than me. The T shirt was just a little too small and the Jeans a little short, but it didn’t seem to matter enough to get another pair. I could only wear these for two hours anyway. 

Right.

I was wasting time. 

Before I left I looked at myself in the mirror. My hair hung past my shoulders. My face seemed to have aged since I had last seen it. My eyes were harder. I was no longer that dopey kid who used to be picked on. But I didn’t feel like the stranger staring back at me either. I didn’t know who I was.

When I came out Marco was back at his game, sipping on his soda. I grabbed the twenty dollar bill and shoved it in my pocket then started for the door.

Marco put his controller down and once again stopped me. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”

I looked at him wondering if he toying with me. “Wh--what?”

“You’re really being one with nature.” I flipped him off, Marco just laughed again.

He crossed to his closet and grabbed a set of Sandals. “My shoes won’t fit, but these might work, it’s an old pair of my dad’s.”

He held them out and after a second I took them feeling like a fool.  _ Right, shoes...humans wore shoes. _

“Thanks.” I was getting better at speaking, the words felt less weird in my mouth. 

“Last thing.” Before I could leave, Marco snatched something from his desk drawer and shoved it in my hands. “You might want that, bird boy.”

I stared down at what he had put in my hands and felt my whole face flush. It was a foil packet, containing a condom. “What? I’m--I’m not. I mean we’re not…”

Marco snorted. “Yeah right...so you come borrow clothes from me, money, and can’t ask Jake because he might want to know why you want all this...probably best not to let the boss know you’re banging his cousin.”

I didn’t know what to say, and instead flipped Marco off again. He laughed at me again and went back to his game. I left Marco’s house and realised I still had the condom in my hand. I shoved it in my pocket and set off. It was weird walking, when I could fly so much faster. But I resisted the urge to morph into a hawk and instead walked to my destination.

Greasy Sal’s Diner was still open, and it had taken me 30 minutes to get there. I figured I had been at Marco’s house for about 20 so that left me with about an hour and 10 minutes to get the food and head back to Rachel’s place.

When I walked in the diner, I was assaulted by smells. It was all fried food. The odor made my stomach flip unpleasantly. I hadn’t eaten human food in a long while and smelling it now made me feel sick. Plus, the bird in me didn’t like being confined in the building, with people I didn’t know. 

I forced myself to walk to the counter and talk to a waitress leaning against the counter. It was a woman in her 30’s, she had pink hair and a nose ring. I wondered was she still human or was I talking to a Yeerk. “Can I get some fries...with uh, meatballs.” I frowned trying to remember what Rachel had said. “I think they’re called loaded fries or something.”

She sounded bored and answered. “We don’t carry that anymore. You’re the second person today asking for it.” She scratched her neck, “We’re having a special on burgers, two for one, double bacon and cheese. How about those?”

I shook my head. “It’s for a friend, she wants fries.”

She sighed. “I don’t control the menu kid. Pick something else.”

I thought about bringing Rachel back a burger and fries, but that wasn’t what she wanted. It wasn’t just about food. I wanted to make something right. I wanted to fix something and this was the only thing I could. I wasn’t giving up. 

“Please, I’ll pay extra.”

“It’s not offered anymore so--” The woman was getting irritated, I could tell.

I cut her off, slapping the 20 dollar bill down. “Please, it can’t be too little, you can have the rest as a tip.”

She stopped talking and stared at me. “Is it for that girl earlier?”

Warily I half nodded. She sighed. “Why is this so important? Are you her boyfriend or something.”

“Just a friend--I’m trying to--”  _ Trying to make this right. Trying to make her forget. Trying to keep her whole.  _ “Cheer her up.”

Something in my voice made the woman look at me closely. “She’s lucky to have you.”  _ I was lucky to have her. _ She shoved the change back across the counter towards me. “Keep the rest of that. It barely cost anything to make anyway, and god knows someone needs to do something nice around here.” She left the counter and went in the back, yelling at one of the cooks. 

Twenty minutes later, I was walking out with a greasy bag of fast food in my hand and trying not to breathe in too much of the scent. It was simultaneously disgusting and enticing. I couldn’t decide whether I wanted to taste the food I was carrying or get far away from it before I puked.

Rachel’s house was 30 minutes away. I slipped in her yard through her back gate, not wanting to draw attention from her neighbors by having a strange guy walking up to her front door. I knocked. It took a second knock before Rachel stormed to the door. “Who is it?”

She froze as she noticed me. Her face morphing from anger, to confusion to surprise. “Tobias?”

“Yeah.” I held up the bag of fast food. “I got something for you.”

She stared at me for a second longer, before reaching out and opening the door. I stepped inside. Noticing I was taller than Rachel now.  _ When had that happened? _ Rachel was wearing a tank top and a tight pair of shorts that came mid thigh. 

I tried not to stare at her, and looked down at my feet. I hooked the fingers of my free hand in one of my pockets and than quickly withdrew them feeling my face flush again as I brushed against the condom that was still there.

“Why are you here?”

“I uh…” I wasn’t good at explaining stuff, at least not in words. Instead I held out the bag of fast food to Rachel. She took it peeking inside and than the hint of a smile crossed her face. “How’d you get this?” 

I shrugged, jammimg my hands once again in my pocket. Rachel surprised me by pulling me into a tight hug. Awkwardly I did my best to hug her back. “You’re amazing Tobias.”

She pulled back after a few seconds, her face flushed and my own feeling hot. I turned to go, but Rachel grabbed my hand. “Come on.”

I wasn’t sure how long I had been in morph exactly but I knew I had to demorph soon, or I would be stuck. “Rachel, it’s almost been two hours.”

“Demorph then remorph, but you have to taste this.”

I started to pull away already thinking of an excuse, but Rachel held my hand tightly, preventing me from leaving. “Please?” That one word was said with as much force as if she had gotten down on her knees and begged. 

“Sure.” I agreed. Demorphing and remorphing is tiring. That’s one reason missions requiring us to be morphed for longer than two hours are exhausting.

I demorphed and remorphed in her downstairs bathroom. When I came back Rachel was settled on the couch, and the opening credits to some movie were playing. The food was spread out on a coffee table, along with soda. 

She patted the spot next to her and I stiffly sat down. Sitting on a sofa felt weird...I was a hawk more than I was a human. Human form was my morph and a bird was my true self. I knew that hurt Rachel when I said stuff like that though, so I forced myself to try to relax and keep silent.

She had put the food on paper plates and I started as I felt one shoved into my hands along with a fork. “You’ll love this.” Rachel dug in, snagging a mouthful and her eyes fluttering closed in pleasure as she tasted it.

I watched Rachel’s face, only for her to open her eyes and look directly at me. She didn’t seem creeped out by me watching her. Instead she melodramatically sighed. “Eat. You’re skinny enough, you need some real food and this is about as real as you can get.” I clumsily grabbed my fork trying to force my fingers to grip it correctly. 

“Sorry--” I was cut off as Rachel put a forkful of food in my mouth. Automatically I closed my mouth. First there was the fries, than hints of something spicy...that was probably the jalapenos, meatballs, savory marinara and than gooey cheese rounded it all out. Or at least I thought that was what I was tasting. I hadn’t paid much attention to the food beyond bringing it to Rachel. Rachel stared at me as I chewed and swallowed. 

“It’s good right?”

“Yeah.” I swallowed uncertainly again, the food had tasted great. But it was strange to be eating cooked food. I was used to a diet of meat, raw, bloody that I had caught myself. I forced myself to take another bite, this time managing to use the fork myself.

We ate together, watching the movie. I think it was called  _ Wonder Woman _ but I was too preoccupied to pay much attention. I was keeping track of the time, worrying about Rachel, trying to act normal, and not puke from all the grease I was eating. 

Ax had mentioned that when we morphed smaller stuff like gut bacteria wasn’t morphed with us. Which meant that when I had started eating raw meat I had a difficult time digesting. And there wasn’t much worse than being sick to your stomach perched on a tree out in a meadow, when all your body could do was regurgitate little pellets, and pepto-bismol was nowhere in sight. 

My stomach had adapted to eating raw meat, and I knew after eating all this cooked greasy food I’d probably be violently sick when I morphed back, but I didn’t want to spoil things. So I forced myself to eat half before I put my plate down. Rachel had already finished hers and moved in closer, her head drifting down until it rested on my shoulder. 

Abruptly she reached out turning off the movie. It was quiet in the living room, then she asked. “Do you think we could have done anything differently?”

I knew she was talking about the camp. “Maybe...maybe we could have done a lot of stuff differently. And maybe it might have been better, maybe it might have been worse.”

She was quiet, I could practically feel how upset she was radiating off her. I tentatively reached a hand up, brushing a piece of her hair back. She smelled like citrus shampoo. “We tried Rachel.”

“Yeah.”

Abruptly she straightened up, pulling away from me and reached out, grabbing the plates. “I better throw this stuff away.” 

She turned to go, not looking at me. But I glimpsed tears once again on her cheeks. She bumped into the coffee table, pitching forward, and the last of the Loaded fries and Meatball concoction landed on my shirt. Her eyes widened “Sorry, I’m...I’m an idiot.”

I stood up pulling the messed up T shirt over my head. “It’s fine. It’s not my shirt anyway.”

She nodded, crying very obviously now. I reached out to hug her, and Rachel surprised me by leaning forward and planting a tentative kiss on my lips. I was so surprised I took a step backwards, knocking into the sofa, only to accidentally pull her down with me. She landed on my bare chest, our faces barely an inch from each other. 

She kissed me again, this time more deliberately and after a moment’s hesitation I reciprocated. I hadn’t felt comfortable wearing clothes, or eating with a fork, but it was like instinct was guiding me as I put a hand in Rachel’s hair, wrapping my fingers around the strands as we kissed.

Her mouth tasted of fast food, and I was sure mine was equally gross but none of that mattered. Marco hadn’t given me underwear to borrow and Rachel was wearing tight shorts. She moved as she kissed me and I gasped at the contact. Rachel pulled away and as she realised what she had done, then very deliberately grinded down on me.

She kept it up for a few minutes and by that time I was fully hard. Rachel abruptly tugged her tank top off, revealing a small sports bra, through which I could see her nipples were erect. 

She laid back, grabbing my hand and pulling me forward so I was above her now. Her hands were at my hips, her face was flushed. She looked so beautiful.

I hovered over her, unsure of what she wanted, but my deliberation stopped as she pulled me into another kiss, this time parting her legs and hooking her ankles behind mine. Without thinking I grinded against her, groaning as she rocked up to meet me.

The fast food was churning in my stomach, and my face felt flushed. The condom in my jean pocket crinkled a little as I moved and I wondered: did I dare pull it out, and what would Rachel do if I did? What would I do if she wanted to use it? Before I could decide Rachel had started to unzip my jeans and I jerked back in surprise. “What?” I blurted it out without thinking.

Her hand faltered and fell back. Her hair was mussed, her eyes were still bright with the remnants of tears. We stared at each other for a moment. “I--” She started to speak then stopped. She tried again. “Don’t you want...This might be our only chance. You’ve only got a little more time in morph, and who knows if we’ll get the chance again… tomorrow...next week...any day…” And then she was crying, and I didn’t need to hear her say the rest to know what she meant. I also knew I didn’t want our first time to be like this. Some desperate rushed needy attempt because we were both miserable, and tomorrow wasn’t a certainty.

I pulled Rachel into my arms, and her tears dripped onto my shoulders. I buried my head in her hair and whispered. “We’re not going to die.”

_ We’re not going to die. _

I wished I believed my own words. 

Rachel laid against me until her tears had stopped. Her breath evened out and after a few minutes I realised she had fallen asleep. I glanced at the clock. Fifteen minutes left in morph. 

Fifteen minutes of humanity left.

I gently lowered Rachel back, covering her with a blanket and brushing her hair back from her face. Her face was calm, peaceful in a way it never was when she was awake. 

I cleaned up our fast food feast.

Five minutes.

I stared at Rachel.

Four minutes.

She was beautiful. So strong. So smart. So willing to sacrifice herself.

Three minutes.

She deserved better than this.  I couldn’t help feeling that eventually our time together would run out. 

She would sacrifice herself to save us all. I knew she would. 

Sometimes, I was sure she wanted to.

Two minutes.

I thought about letting the time run out and staying as a human. I wouldn’t be an animorph. I could be human again. I could get out of the fight. But Rachel would never stop.

And I wouldn’t leave her. 

One minute.

I leaned down and kissed her forehead. Just the barest hint of lips against her skin. Sleepily she sighed.

Thirty seconds.

I undressed and stepped outdoors locking the door behind me.

Fifteen seconds.

I demorphed. As my human eyes faded one tear landed on my feathers.

I rose into the sky.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading.


End file.
